May 3, 2003

Redneck Reveille - JW and Michael vs. the Skunk in the Culvert   

As I was contemplating getting out of bed at 7:00 on Thursday morning, JW ran into the house and said, “Get ready for a big bang…  That skunk is in the culvert and I’m going to shoot him!”  Of course, I sat straight up in bed - just in time to see him grab his rifle and go out the door.  I went to watch out the window as he walked out to the back of the yard and met Michael.  They spent a few minutes poking a long pipe into the culvert to scare the skunk out.  Disappointingly, this provided no result.  After a brief consultation, Michael headed back to the equipment barn and JW to the garage.  When they came back they were armed with a large paper sack, a rag, and a large can of gasoline.  Hmmm, I thought I had better put on my robe and sit out on the back steps.  Obviously, there was going to be a show.  With the purpose of smoking the varmint out and into firing range, the sack was crumpled and stuffed into the opening of the ten-inch culvert, thoroughly doused with gasoline - and lit.  Big bang indeed!  It took about three seconds for that culvert to shoot the sack out - like a flaming cannonball - about fifteen feet away.  JW and Michael got a big kick out of that, as you can well imagine.  As hard as they tried, that darned skunk never emerged.  We figure that he was either knocked unconscious, killed in the “blast,” or has a den dug out underground.  I’m going to root for the latter, and hope that he does learn that he must move his home out of range of the boys.

The rush of Uncle Sam's 2002 Tax Season is “officially over.”  I've seen everything from shrimp boats to incorporated family farms to missionaries in South America.  We three girls at the office made a good run, and determined that April 15th really was a light at the end of the tunnel - rather than a train!  It's back to a more normal pace now, and we are all comparing notes on our gardening endeavors.  Hollie told me that I have a real knack for tax returns; he thinks I should spend this summer studying tax laws, and then take the test this fall to become an Enrolled Agent.  Basically, I would be certified to represent individuals and businesses before the IRS.  Imagine, government certification to be anal retentive!  We shall see how it goes.

This weekend is the Spring Bird Count for Matagorda County, and JW and I have admired Painted Buntings, Indigo Buntings, and Eastern Bluebirds.  Pretty neat.  The last few weeks have been dry with perfect temperatures.  80s during the day and 60s at night - with that steady south breeze.  I spend as much time as I can outside!  The farmers have finally had a chance to be very busy, and the fields are now teeming with new crops of milo, cotton, and rice.  We do need a good shower now though, and are hoping that this is not indicative of a dry summer!  The wildflowers were amazing this year creating carpets of red, white and blue throughout the countryside.

Easter Weekend was pretty quiet, with a new surprise for the dogs.  We loaded them up on Good Friday morning and drove down to Matagorda beach.  They had so much fun!Madra immediately found a stick for us to throw into the water for her. She went leaping out, and realized quickly that the waves would prove challenging.  After only a few times being somersaulted in the breakers, she figured out how to time her charge.  Never taking her eye off of the stick, she would "jump-pause-jump" over the first two waves, grab the stick, and turn around to ride the next wave in.  Mascot, as always, was waiting where she could still touch bottom to grab one end of the stick and "help" Madra bring it in.  It really is cute to watch them play with each other, fetching and wrestling and playing tag.  We have been to the Pasture Pond since that trip, and Mascot has decided that she is now brave enough to swim out to the middle.  What fun!

The chickens had some excitement of their own on Easter Morning.  They finally got their own place and moved out of the wash house!

We had been letting them out of their cage on Saturdays to wander around the side yard, but this was their first time for the outdoor experience to extend past sundown.  They have settled in very well, and will probably have another week or two of location acclamation before they are let out every day.  Even then, they will still need to be brought into the coop at night for fear of owls and coyotes.  Can you believe that someday these birds will enable me to issue the command, "Off with his head!" and actually have the order carried out?

We have made a couple of additions to the brood, and have a total of 12 birds:

·                     3 Sussex

·                     3 Bantams (including Top Knot)

·                     2 New Hampshire Reds (Mae & Junebug)

·                     1 Leghorn (Foghorn)

·                     2 Barred Plymouth Rocks (Heckyl & Jeckyl)

·                     1 Lavender Guinea (Ms. Grace Peabody)

I swear that watching those birds is better than what they put on television!  JW and I let have started letting them out of the coop in the evenings to wander about eating bugs and grass for an hour or so.  Mascot has proved to be quite a chicken herder.  She gets so excited when they come out, she can hardly stand it!  She sits as still as she can and watches them bustle around.  When they get close to her, she backs up and sometimes runs away!  She does the same thing with the calves too.  They will come over to sniff her, and she wimps out at the last minute to come and hide behind me.  All four calves come marching over to inspect the chickens, and will stand and watch for quite some time.  Those stinkers are all so gentle that we can scratch their noses while they lick our hands.  I should probably go into business raising show calves because people will pay more if they're already halter-broken!  The last calf this year was a boy, and is known as Buster Brown.  He tries hard to keep up with Curly, Frosty, and Dutch - but they give him a run for his money.

Ms. Peabody (the Guinea) seems to like wandering at a greater distance than the chickens.  She took off the other evening at a brisk clip, and ended up all of the way over in the backyard of the house.  I followed her (quickly, but discreetly!), and kept her from going any further on only her second outing.  I don't think that she has ever been out of a cage before we brought her home, and she was pretty excited, chirping and clucking and gurgling the whole time.  Guineas are reportedly very good watchdogs, and will sound alarms for snakes and other intruders.  I have also heard that they are sometimes pretty good at killing the snakes.  Handy to have around!  I hope that when she starts being let out, that she will come to visit the house and clean up some of the bugs in the yard.  She is a quite a funny looking bird with dangling red cheeks and a dinosaur-like horn on top of her head!

We went for a drive this past weekend to see what new parts of Texas we could find.  In search of the Blue Bell Creamery, we wandered up to Brenham.  Upon arrival, I found out that they don't have a single dairy cow on site for people to see!  Can you imagine?  We decided not to take the tour, although we certainly did not leave without a scoop of ice cream each.  Further exploration brought us to a beautiful place called Round Top.  As we came around a bend, an interesting steeple came into view over the trees, so of course we set off to find the entrance.  Would you believe that we found The International Festival Institute?  I'll bet you never knew such a place existed.  Trust the German Texans to come up with that one...

So, on that note I will leave you with thoughts of spring livestock and pleasant surprises.  Happy May!